Brooklyn Friends School operates under a fundamental premise that challenges conventional educational hierarchies: children serve as primary teachers for the adults charged with their education. Head of School Crissy Cáceres has built her leadership philosophy around this principle, describing students as architects of possibility who design solutions that adults might overlook or dismiss.
“Children are my greatest dream architects,” Cáceres explained during a recent interview. “They give me every ounce of, not that I need the permission, but the affirmation of this is worth the good fight, this is worth the boundary, this is worth the solicitation of a donor, this is worth the reconstruction of a policy, this is just worth it.”
Crissy Cáceres’ perspective emerged from nearly 30 years working with children, beginning when she became a camp counselor at age 14. Her experience spans formal classroom teaching, including 10 years as a third-grade teacher, and various leadership roles in educational settings.
Unfiltered Wisdom of Children
Crissy Cáceres credits children with possessing qualities that adults often lose through socialization and professional conditioning. “Children are unfiltered in the most beautiful of ways,” she observed.
“They are able to sense energy and body language uniquely so. Eighty percent of what we say, we say with our body language, and a child knows if you are there in support of them, they know if you believe in them, they know if you’re taking them seriously.”
Classroom interactions at Brooklyn Friends School reflect this understanding, where teachers arrange seating in circular or amoeba-like configurations instead of traditional rows facing forward. “You might have to look around to find the teacher,” Cáceres noted. “They’re not at the front of the room, where are they? They might be on the floor. They might be in the hallway connecting with the teacher about something while the children are collaborating on something.”
Physical arrangement reflects deeper philosophical commitments. Teachers position themselves as facilitators instead of sole authorities, creating space for student voices to emerge and guide learning processes.
Children possess what Cáceres describes as natural empathy that surpasses adult capacity. “No adult can come close to a child recognizing when someone is in pain, and that they either need to stand closer to them, invite them to play with them, make space for a conversation,” she explained. “They know how to communicate a connection to pain.”
From Vision to Action
Crissy Cáceres emphasizes that she operates as an “action” leader who focuses on concrete steps toward realizing visions that children present, moving past abstract appreciation for childlike imagination.
Students regularly come to Crissy Cáceres with proposals that adults might categorize as unrealistic or disruptive. She treats them as collaborative opportunities that reveal authentic student needs and aspirations instead of dismissing these initiatives.
“Children always have a need because they think it will make something better,” Cáceres noted. “Children never come and say, ‘Do this because it’s going to be hurtful, do this because it’s going to exclude.'”
Her principle guides her response to student activism and protest efforts. When colleagues warned that students might organize demonstrations, Cáceres expressed enthusiasm instead of concern. Her background in debate—she was the first Afro-Latina debater on the national circuit during her youth—informs her appreciation for student advocacy and argument.
Courage and Truth-Telling
Children demonstrate qualities that Crissy Cáceres believes adults should emulate instead of suppress. “Children have taught me that they are immensely courageous because they are willing to speak to those needs,” she observed.
Courage manifests in classroom discussions where students address difficult topics directly. Cáceres described observing students who “spoke about the need for change, and while doing so, they inserted themselves as action agents of that change.”
Brooklyn Friends School uses restorative practices that center student voices and experiences instead of implementing traditional disciplinary measures.
Cáceres shared an example involving seventh-grade students who had attempted to use coded inappropriate language. She convened a full day of restoration beginning with establishing truth as the foundation for dialogue instead of pursuing punishment.
“The first thing is that we cannot have a conversation unless you begin with truth,” she told the students. “You have the gift of taking this opportunity to only connect to the truth. And without that, I actually can’t help you and you can’t help yourselves.”
Students responded by taking responsibility for their actions, with one admitting he had initially lied to his father about his involvement. Honesty led to deeper conversations about empathy and human connection.
Curiosity Over Certainty
Children at Brooklyn Friends School embody what Crissy Cáceres describes as a preference for curiosity over certainty. “They are always more curious than certain, and so they don’t bring forth demands,” she explained. “What they bring forth are wishes and hopes and dreams in the context of what they believe is going to be for the betterment of something.”
Such distinction between demands and wishes represents a fundamental difference between adult and child methods for problem-solving. Children present possibilities instead of ultimatums, creating space for collaborative exploration of solutions.
Cáceres particularly values the way children frame their requests in terms of collective benefit instead of individual advantage. She recalled one child explaining that a proposed change would make things “gooder,” a grammatically imperfect but conceptually sound assessment that captured the essence of improvement-focused thinking.
“It will be gooder if you do this, Crissy,” the child explained. Cáceres responded, “Yes, it will be gooder.” Her exchange demonstrates her commitment to validating child perspectives even when expressed through developing language skills.
Redefining Adult-Child Relationships
Her “creative architect” philosophy requires adults to abandon traditional authority structures that position teachers as knowledge holders and students as passive recipients. Crissy Cáceres advocates for relationships built on mutual respect and shared learning.
“The minute that we decide that we know more at any given time about what they do, we have failed them because we’re not showing our confidence that the rate of the development of the world has outpaced our skillset and our level of exposure relative to themselves,” she stated.
